


Don't Let Me Go, Cos I'm Tired Of Feeling Alone

by valiumcolouredsky (orphan_account)



Series: Because I Got High [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Boys Kissing, Break Up, Cheating, Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Infidelity, Kissing, M/M, Multi, Pining, Snogging, Sobbing, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Romantic Tension, lots and lots of crying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2018-01-02 02:20:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1051385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/valiumcolouredsky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is the sequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/842809%20">So Come On, Get Higher, Loosen My Lips</a>.</p><p>It's not gonna make any sense unless you read the first part, so do that first(:</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Let Me Go, Cos I'm Tired Of Feeling Alone

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry that it took me so long to update. I've been going through a lot of shit lately and it sucks.  
> but i hope you enjoy. feedback is greatly appreciated.

Harry slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position, looking around the room. He glanced down to the piece of paper again, that was clenched between his fingers, before crumbling it up and chucking it across the room.

 

“Fuck.” He whispered, bringing his knees up and wrapping his arms around them. He dropped his head down in between his knees, his breathing getting deeper.

 

Then he felt it. His eyes started burning and soon there were tears spilling over.

 

“Fuck!” He shouted, bringing his hands up and gripping his hair between his fingers.

 

He didn’t know what to do. Just then, he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He reached down and fished it out of his jeans. He looked at the screen only to be met with a reminder set in his calendar.

 

‘ _Dear Hazza, don’t forget to do the laundry today. –Lou xx’_

Harry dropped his phone and dropped his head into his hands, letting out a small sob.

 

He had messed up. This was really big. He had possibly ruined one of the best friendships he’d ever had; had possibly messed up the band.

 

He scrubbed at his eyes with shaky hands before reaching out for his phone. He opened his messages and shakily typed one out to Liam.

 

‘ _Li. I fucked up.’_

He hit send, staring at the screen until it said that he had read the message. Five seconds later, his phone started vibrating in his hand.

 

‘ _Liam Calling.’_

 

Harry carefully swiped his thumb across the screen, accepting the call and bringing the phone up to his ear.

 

“ _Harry, what the fuck did you do? How stupid-“_

Harry cut him off with a small sob, his vision being blurred by his tears.

 

“ _Shit, Haz. What’s wrong? What happened?”_ Liam asked quietly.

 

”Li, I- I fu- I fucked up. I fucked up so bad. I don- I don’t know what to do.” Harry sobbed out.

 

“ _Haz, you gotta calm down. Can you tell me what happened? I don’t know how to help if I don’t know what’s wrong.”_ Liam told him.

 

”Y-Yeah. Uhm... Louis- He- We- Fuck!” Harry sobbed.

 

“ _Shit, Harry, is Louis okay?_ ” Liam asked.

 

“I don- I don’t know. He’s- He’s not here.” Harry hiccupped out.

 

” _Where is he? Is he hurt?”_ Liam asked.

 

”No. Li- He’s- He went to El’s.” Harry croaked.

 

“ _Did you- Are you- Did you get in a fight?”_ Liam all but whispered.

 

“I don’t- I don’t think so.” Harry sobbed out.

 

“ _Fuck. Haz, I’m gonna come over, okay? I’ll make us some tea and we can talk about what happened, alright?”_ Liam said softly.

 

”Y-Yeah.” Harry whispered, sniffling and rubbing at his eyes.

 

” _I’m leaving now. I’ll be there in like five minutes.”_ Liam told him.

 

”Okay. Th-Thank you.” Harry sniffled out.

 

“ _Love you, Haz. I’m sure everything’s gonna be fine.”_ And then the line went dead.

 

”Yeah...” Harry whispered out.

 

He locked his phone and dropped it on the bed, lying back down and curling into himself. He grabbed one of the pillows and wrapped his arms around it, pushing his face into the soft fabric.

 

Before he knew it, he heard the front door open.

 

“Haz?” Liam called.

 

Harry let out a whimper and pushed his face further into the pillow. He choked out a muffled sob as he heard Liam’s footstep coming up the stairs. He heard his door open across the hall and then a confused ‘ _Haz?_ ’ come from Liam.

 

Harry let out a whine as more tears escaped his eyes, soaking the pillow. He heard a shuffling noise and then the door slowly creak open.

 

“Harry.” Liam breathed out.

 

Before Harry knew what was happening, he was wrapped up in Liam’s arms.

 

“Shh, shh. Come on, love. You’re alright.” Liam cooed, stroking through Harry’s curls as the boy let out a broken sob into the pillow.

 

Liam let out a soft sigh and pulled Harry into his lap. Sometimes, Harry forgot how strong Liam was, so he let out a small squeak as he was pulled up. He held onto the pillow but tucked his face into Liam’s neck, his tears hitting the warm skin.

 

“Shit, Haz. What the hell happened?” Liam whispered, stroking his hand through Harry’s hair. “And why are you in Lou’s room?” He asked softly.

 

Harry hiccupped out a whine, clenching his eyes shut harder.

 

“Come on, love. You gotta tell me what’s wrong.” Liam said.

 

Harry took a deep breath before pulling back from Liam’s neck, looking up at the boy. Liam let out a small sigh and reached up to wipe away the boy’s tears. He saw something dark out of the corner of his eye and grabbed Harry’s chin, tilting it up.

 

“Jesus, H. What happened to your neck?!” Liam questioned. Harry just let out a small whimper and closed his eyes. “Did you bring somebody home?” Liam asked.

 

“No.” Harry croaked out.

 

“Then who the fuck did this?” Liam asked.

 

“L-Lou-“

 

“Louis did this?!” Liam exclaimed. Harry nodded, his eyes still shut. “What the hell? Why?” Liam questioned. Harry let out a whimper before dropping his face into the pillow, letting out a small sob. “Is- Is he why you’re like this?” Liam whispered. Harry picked his head up, his eyes bloodshot and pleading as he nodded. “Fuck. You gotta tell me what happened.” Liam said softly.

 

Harry let out a small hiccup as Liam reached up and wiped off his face. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

 

“We- We, uhm... Yesterday, we got, uhm, we got high.” Harry whispered.

 

“You what?!” Liam exclaimed.

 

“I- I didn’t want to at first but you kn-know Louis.” Liam sighed but nodded. “But, uhm, he like- He, uhm- I didn’t really want to _smoke_ so he- He did that thing, where you, uhm- You blow the smoke in the other person’s mouth.” Harry choked out.

 

“Shotgunning. Yeah, I know what that is.” Liam sighed. “But why did he do this?” He asked, running his thumb over the dark marks on Harry’s neck.

 

“He, uhm, he kissed me. On accident at first. A-And then he- he, uhm, he got hard and h-he started, like, grinding into my lap.” Liam’s eyebrow rose at that.

 

“Did he, like- Were you okay with that? He didn’t, like...” Liam said slowly.

 

“What? No! Fuck no, Li! It was- I was fine with it. F-Fuck. I-I love him, you know? N-Never told anyone because I d-didn’t wanna f-fuck things up.” Harry hiccupped out.

 

“Haz...” Liam sighed.

 

“Yeah, I know, Li. It’s never gonna happen but it was nice while it lasted, y’know?” Harry whispered.

 

Liam let out another sigh. “That’s not what- H, I- What else happened?” Liam asked softly.

 

“Oh... He, uh, he took another hit and was gonna like do that thing again but instead he just kissed me, like really kissed me. And I kissed back. B-But then I- I stopped because, like, Eleanor. And he’s straight, Liam! He’s fucking straight! But he, uhm, he didn’t want to stop. He did, though. He, like- I told him I didn’t want him to- to regret me.” Harry all but whispered.

 

“Haz, you know he would n-“

 

“Don’t fucking tell me he wouldn’t. He already does. He fucking left me. He left me a note on the pillow and he went to Eleanor’s.” Harry said harshly.

 

“Harry, I don’t know what to say.” Liam said.

 

“He told me he wanted me, Liam. What was I supposed to do?! I fucking love him! I’ve been in love with him for awhile. What would you do if the person you were in love with said they wanted you?” Harry whispered.

 

“How long?” Liam asked.

 

“What?” Harry said, sniffling a bit as he reached up to rub his eyes, tears threatening to spill.

 

“How long have you been in love with him, Harry?” Liam asked again.

 

Harry let out a small whimper and turned to push his face into Liam’s neck.

 

“Always.” Harry whispered.

 

“What?” Liam said.

 

“Since the beginning. Since X Factor.” Harry sniffled, a couple tears running down his face.

 

Liam sometimes forgot that Harry was younger than all of them. He was still so young and vulnerable. It made Liam almost mad that Louis would ever hurt him. Harry was sensitive and he was still trying to figure things out. The pressure of the media never helped; always pegging him as a womaniser and a sex icon. Harry was honestly none of those things. In fact, Liam couldn’t even remember Harry ever bringing anyone back to the hotel rooms while they were on tour. He never talked about people he slept with. He always got quiet when Louis talked about Eleanor, or when she was brought up in interviews. Liam now understood why that was.

 

“Oh...” Liam breathed out.

 

Harry nodded into his neck before letting out a small, choked off sob.

 

“Come on, Haz. You’re alright.” Liam cooed, rubbing his palm up and down Harry’s back.

 

Harry let out a whimper before another sob. “I love him so fucking much, Li. I don- I don’t know what I’d do without him. I fu- I fucked up s-so bad. I kn-know he regrets everything. He pr-probably f-fucking hates me. I’m so _stupid_! Fuck! I’m- I’m just a st-stupid fucking kid th-that’s in love with his b-best friend.” Harry sobbed out.

 

 

“Haz, Harry, stop!” Liam exclaimed. Harry froze, not used to Liam yelling. “I’m sure none of that’s true. I can assure you he doesn’t hate you. You didn’t fuck anything up, love. You’re not stupid, Haz. I’m sure Louis just has some things he obviously needs to work out.” Liam said soothingly.

 

“I don’t know what to do.” Harry whispered through his tears before letting out another sob.

 

“Fuck, Haz. I’m gonna kill him. I can’t believe he did this.” Liam said.

 

Harry let out a small sniffle, his hand curling into Liam’s t-shirt. “Don’t. It’s not worth it. I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up. I just hope the band will be okay. I don’t care if I don’t get to be with him. I just want to keep him as a friend. I hope that’s not too much to ask.” Harry whispered.

 

“Harry...” Liam choked out. He pressed a kiss into Harry’s curls, letting out a small sigh. “Haz, you just- You just gotta let him work things out. He’s probably scared because he’s never been with a boy before. What even did you guys do? Did you, like... Uhm...” Liam trailed off, making weird gestures with his hands.

 

Harry let out a small snort. “Are you asking if we had sex?” Harry chuckled out.

 

“Uhm, yeah...” Liam said, blushing as he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck.

 

Harry sighed. “No, Li. We didn’t. We just, uh... We just got off together. There wasn’t even any, like, skin contact. We- It was just like, uhm, grinding. You probably really don’t need all the details but yeah...” Harry said softly.

 

“Oh, well... Okay, then.” Liam said.

 

“Yeah...” Harry sighed, tucking his head under Liam’s chin.

 

They were silent for a couple minutes, Liam stroking through Harry’s sleep matted curls.

 

“You okay now, love?” Liam asked softly.

 

“No.” Harry breathed out. “Calmer, but not okay.”

 

“How ‘bout I go make some tea? How does that sound?” Liam questioned softly, gently massaging his fingers into Harry’s scalp.

 

“Yeah, that’s- Yeah. Just- I need to take a shower and change. I, uhm, kinda fell asleep in the clothes that, uhm, yeah...” Harry whispered out, his cheeks heating up.

 

“Oh, god. Yeah, go do that. That can’t be comfortable.” Liam chuckled out.

 

Harry let out a small sigh and nodded, pulling back from Liam’s neck. He reached a hand up and scrubbed at his eyes, trying to stop any more tears. Liam carded his fingers through Harry’s hair before bringing his hand to cup Harry’s jaw, stroking over the boy’s damp cheek.

 

He let out a small sigh before leaning in, pressing a soft kiss to Harry’s cheek.

 

“I’m sure everything’s gonna be fine.” Liam said softly, reassuringly.

 

Harry let out a small whimper but nodded.

 

“Thanks, Li.” Harry whispered.

 

Liam nodded. “You’re welcome, Haz. Why don’t you go shower and I’ll go down and make some tea. Have you eaten yet?” Liam asked.

 

“Uhm, no...” Harry sniffled out.

 

Liam let out a heavy sigh. “Go shower, love. I’ll make some food.” He said.

 

“Alright.” Harry sighed out.

 

He carefully crawled out of Liam’s lap and got up from the bed, making his way to the door. Liam followed him up but instead went down the stairs as Harry made his way to the bathroom. He shut the door behind himself and made his way to the shower to turn it on.

 

He stripped out of his clothes while waiting for the water to heat up, placing them in the hamper. He spotted Louis’ clothes in there, making him let out a heavy sigh before he climbed into the shower.

 

He just stood under the spray, hair matted to his face, eyes closed, for a little while. He really had fucked up. And maybe Louis didn’t hate him, but things were never going to be the same between them.

 

His eyes started tearing up again but he just let it happen, not giving a care. He reached out for the shampoo and poured some in his palm, bringing his hands up to scrub at his hair. He washed out the suds then put conditioner in his hair.

 

He let the conditioner sit while he washed his body, ridding himself of the reminder of last night. He quickly finished showering before stepping out onto the mat, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around his waist.

 

He let out a small sniffle as he moved in front of the sink to brush his teeth. He did that quickly then made his way to his room. He got dressed before he exited his room, making his way down the stairs into the kitchen.

 

+

 

Liam made his way to the kitchen to make food for Harry. He felt bad for the boy. He honestly did. He couldn’t even imagine what Harry must feel like. He kept thinking about it while he made the boy breakfast. He made bacon and eggs, leaving them on the stove to stay warm while he waited for Harry and made tea.

 

Liam was still thinking about what happened. He was honestly pissed at Louis. Louis, out of all people, should know how fragile Harry is. He was very sensitive and wore his heart on his sleeve. The fact that Louis had left the boy, in his own bed, to go to Eleanor’s, made Liam’s blood boil.

 

He reached in his pocket and pulled out his phone, finding Louis’ contact and pressing call. He brought the phone up to his ear, waiting for Louis to answer. He was about to hang up when the boy answered, his voice travelling through the speaker.

 

“ _Hey, Li! What’s up?_ ” Louis asked.

 

“I cannot believe you. You’re a fucking dick, is what’s up.” Liam said angrily.

 

“ _Uh, what the fuck are you talking about, mate?”_ Louis questioned.

 

“Don’t act stupid, Louis. I know what happened.”

 

“ _I don-“_

“Harry called me crying this morning. What the fuck is your problem?” Liam asked harshly.

 

“ _Why was he crying?_ ” Louis barely whispered.

 

“You left him. You fucking got off with him and then you told him you were going to Eleanor’s. No. You didn’t even tell him. You left him a fucking note. You can’t just lead him on like that. He has feelings, Louis. If all you wanted was to get off, you should’ve done it yourself. He thinks you hate him. I don’t know what possessed you to do this but you need to fix it.” Liam said.

 

“ _I- I don’t- Fuck, Li. I- Fuck!”_ Louis groaned out.

 

“You don’t what?” Liam asked.

 

“ _I don’t hate him. Just- Let him know, okay?”_ Louis whispered.

 

“Yeah, sure. Anything else?” Liam questioned angrily.

 

“ _I don’t- I don’t know, alright.”_ Louis said quietly.

 

“Don’t come back until you’ve figured your shit out.” Liam said, hanging up before Louis could respond.

 

Liam heard a small sniffle and turned around to see Harry standing in the doorway, clutching the hem of his shirt between his fingers.

 

“How much of that did you hear?” Liam asked.

 

“Most of it.” Harry whispered.

 

Harry let out a small hiccup before bringing his hand up to cover his mouth as he let out a sob. Liam was up in an instant, moving over to the crying boy and wrapping him in his arms.

 

“Shh, shh. You’re alright, love. You’re okay. I’m sorry. Everything’s gonna be fine. I promise it’s gonna be okay.” Liam soothed, running his hands through Harry’s hair and up and down his back. “Come on, babe. Come have some food.” Liam whispered.

 

Harry sniffled but nodded, pulling back from Liam to reach up and wipe his eyes. Liam guided Harry to the table before moving to get his food. He brought over the food before making Harry his tea. He brought that to the table and sat down next to the boy, reaching over to place a hand on his shoulder.

 

“It’s all gonna be fine, Harry. Trust me.” Liam said softly. “Also, Louis doesn’t hate you.”

 

Harry sniffled as he ate a bite of eggs. “Doesn’t matter.” He whispered.

 

“Haz...”

 

“No, Liam. It doesn’t matter! It’d be best to just forget about it. I’m just gonna move on. I don’t really care anymore. It’s not like anything’s gonna come from it. He’s not gonna magically tell me he loves me too. That shit doesn’t actually happen so let’s just forget it, alright?” Harry said harshly.

 

“I- Yeah... I guess.” Liam sighed, not wanting to argue with the boy.

 

Harry let out a small huff and continued eating his breakfast, sipping on his tea every once in awhile. He seemed considerably calmer by the time he was done eating.

 

“You alright, Haz?” Liam asked softly.

 

Harry nodded. “Yeah. Thank you for breakfast.” He replied.

 

“You’re welcome. Do you want me to stay?” Liam asked.

 

Harry nodded again, looking up from where his head had been in his hands. “Please.” He whispered.

 

“Of course, love. Why don’t you go to the living room and I’ll take care of the dishes.” Liam said gently.

 

“You don’t have to-“

 

“Just let me, yeah? It’s just a few. Just go sit down. I’ll be in a bit.” Liam murmured.

 

“I- Yeah.” Harry leant over and pecked the corner of his mouth.

 

“You’re ridiculous.” Liam chuckled out as he got up from the table and picked up the dishes. Harry stood up after him, hovering near the boy. “Go.” Liam said, pointing towards the doorway.

 

Harry nodded, a slight, half smile on his face. He turned and walked out of the room, making his way to the couch. He curled up next to the arm, pulling the blanket off the back of the sofa and covering himself.

 

Liam came into the room a few minutes later, carrying two cups of tea. He set his on the coffee table and Harry’s on the end table, next to him.

 

Harry smiled at him softly and lifted the blanket up as an invitation. Liam smiled and nodded.

 

“Scooch down a bit.” Liam mumbled.

 

Harry nodded and shuffled around until there was a Liam sized spot between him and the end of the couch. Liam climbed into it, pulling Harry in between his legs that he stretched down the couch and wrapped his arms around the boy’s stomach, his back resting against the arm.

 

Harry let out a soft sigh and brought his hands up, twining his fingers together with Liam’s. Liam started absentmindedly stroking his thumb into Harry’s stomach, the action calming Harry immensely.

 

“Thank you, Li.” Harry whispered.

 

Liam let out a soft breath and nodded, turning to kiss the side of Harry’s head. “You’re welcome, love.” Liam replied just as quietly.

 

They were quiet for a bit before Harry spoke up.

 

“Li, can- Can I talk to you about something?” Harry asked.

 

“Anything, Haz. You should know that.” Liam told him.

 

“I- It’s about- It’s about what happened. I- Uhm- It’s just-“

 

“Take your time.” Liam said.

 

“I- I haven’t- I haven’t been with- with someone in awhile and it-“ Harry cut himself off with a small huff.

 

“How long is awhile?” Liam asked.

 

“Uhm- Like- Like over a year...” Harry whispered.

 

“You- You’re serious? Like nobody?” Liam questioned, astonished by Harry’s confession.

 

“I- Yeah. God, this is gonna sound stupid. But, uhm- I was- I didn’t really want anyone but- but Louis. I- I fucked around a lot at first, trying to get over him. But it wasn’t working so I just- I just gave up, I guess.” Harry said quietly.

 

“Oh.” Liam breathed out.

 

“Yeah...” Harry trailed off.

 

“You- You really like him, huh?” Liam said softly.

 

“Y-Yeah. Fuck, I love him, Liam. Always have. I just- I can’t even explain it.” Harry said softly.

 

Liam heard a small sniffle so he tightened his arms around Harry, pulling him in closer. Harry let out a small whimper and released one of Liam’s hands to bring his up to scrub at his eyes.

 

Harry brought his hand back down and laced his fingers with Liam’s. He was quiet for awhile and Liam could practically hear the gears turning in his head.

 

“What’s on your mind, Haz?” Liam murmured.

 

“I- Can I- Can I- N-Never mind. It’s stupid.” Harry grumbled out.

 

“Can you what?” Liam asked sternly.

 

“It’s- It’s weird. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable." Harry whispered.

 

“You won’t. I promise. Just tell me what you wanna do.” Liam said reassuringly.

 

“Can I- Can I kiss you?” Harry whispered so quietly, Liam barely caught it.

 

“I- Oh. I mean-“

 

“See, I told you it’s weird. I’m sorry. I’m just gonna go take a nap.” Harry said, making to get up from the couch.

 

Liam pulled him back down, wrapping his arms around the younger boy’s chest. “I didn’t say no. But can you tell me why? I thought, Louis.” Liam asked softly.

 

“It- It’s comforting. It makes me feel comfortable. I just- I really need- I’m sorry. I’m gonna-“ Harry cut himself off, trying to squirm out of Liam’s grip.

 

“Haz, stop.” Harry stilled. “Of course you can. If it’s gonna comfort you and make you feel even just a bit better, I’d be glad to.” Liam said softly, stroking Harry’s chest with his thumb.

 

“I- Yeah?” Harry whispered.

 

“Yeah.” Liam replied.

 

“I- Okay. Can I just- I need to-“ Harry said shakily, squirming in Liam’s hold.

 

Liam loosened his grip and let Harry move. Harry slowly turned around and carefully straddled Liam’s lap, wrapping his arms around the boy’s neck.

 

“Is this okay?” Harry asked quietly.

 

Liam nodded, his eyes trained on Harry’s slightly parted lips. He glanced up to the boy’s eyes, smiling slightly.

 

Harry slowly started leaning in, their noses brushing before their lips gently pressed together. Harry let out a sigh though his nose and twisted his fingers in Liam’s hair, pushing deeper into the kiss. He softly captured Liam’s bottom lip between his own lips, just staying there for a bit.

 

That’s all it was; soft and warm and comfortable.

 

Harry gently started moving his lips against Liam’s, meeting over and over again. Liam’s eyes slipped shut as he snaked his arms around Harry’s waist, his warm palms resting on the boy’s back.

 

Harry tilted his head to the side and pushed his tongue out, pressing it against Liam’s lips. Liam let out a small sigh and parted his lips, giving Harry access to his mouth. The boy’s tongue slipped inside his mouth, gently running over his own.

 

Liam tilted his head and pushed his tongue against Harry’s, their tongues slowly twirling together. Harry’s fingers curled into Liam’s short hair, pulling the boy closer. Liam let it happen.

 

After awhile, Harry pulled back, resting his forehead against Liam’s.

 

“Th-Thank you. I- Thank you. Thank you so much.” Harry breathed out.

 

“Yeah. You any better?” Liam asked softly.

 

“I- Yeah. Can I- Again?” Harry whispered.

 

“Whatever you need. As much as you want, Haz.” Liam replied gently, running his palm up and down Harry’s back.

 

“I- Oh God. Thank you. Thank you so much.” Harry breathed out.

 

He tilted his head down and softly connected their lips, drinking Liam in. The warmth, the comfort. He felt safe; protected. Liam always made him feel like that, more so now than any other time.

 

Eventually, they stopped kissing. Liam made them lunch and more tea. They spent the afternoon lying on the couch, watching TV. It started getting dark out but Liam was reluctant to leave.

 

“Hey, Haz. D’you want me to stay the night?” Liam asked softly, stroking through Harry’s curls.

 

“That’d be nice.” He murmured, turning to press his face into Liam’s shirt from where he was curled into the boy’s side.

 

“Alright. Why don’t we go have some dinner? It’s getting to be about that time.” Liam suggested.

 

“Mm, yeah. Sounds good.” Harry said.

 

“Come on. Let’s go see what you have.” Liam said.

 

Harry nodded and slowly got up from the couch, waiting for Liam before they made their way to the kitchen.

 

“Anything you specifically want?” Liam asked.

 

“Can we have pasta?” Harry asked quietly.

 

“Of course.” Liam replied, smiling at the younger boy.

 

“Thanks. Can- Can I-“ Harry gestured for Liam to come towards him.

 

Liam stepped up in front of him, looking up at the boy. Harry hesitantly reached up, cupping Liam’s jaw. He leant down and connected their lips, moving them against each other. Harry pulled back after a minute, breathing softly before pulling his hand away.

 

“Thanks.” He whispered.

 

“Don’t have to thank me, Haz. But I’m gonna make dinner now, alright? Go sit down.” Liam said softly.

 

Harry nodded and pulled back, making his way to the table. Liam bumbled about, getting everything he needed to make pasta. When it was done, he brought it to the table, setting the dishes down.

 

They ate in silence, Liam cleaning the dishes afterwards. Harry got up and moved over to Liam, standing in front of the boy.

 

“Why don’t we go watch a movie, Haz? Just relax a bit.” Liam suggested.

 

“Can we watch it upstairs?” Harry asked quietly, looking down to his feet.

 

“Of course we can.” Liam chuckled out.

 

Harry picked his head up, smiling timidly at Liam. He leant in and pecked the boy’s lips before scampering past him, headed towards the stairs. Liam smiled and followed him up, finding Harry in his briefs, curled up under the blankets of his bed.

 

“Ridiculous. You’re absolutely ridiculous.” Liam chuckled out.

 

Harry just gave him a dimpled grin before, pointing the remote at the TV, turning the flat screen on. Liam made his way to Harry’s bed, pulling his shirt and pants off before climbing in. Harry had an eyebrow raised, making Liam laugh.

 

“What?! Figured I’ll probably fall asleep. May as well be prepared.” Liam said.

 

Harry smiled before turning back to the TV, hitting play when the DVD menu popped up. Apparently they were watching The Hobbit, which was alright because both boys loved it.

 

Liam wrapped his arm around Harry, pulling the boy in. Harry snuggled into his side, nuzzling into his chest.

 

“Might fall asleep during. Just a warning.” Liam said, stroking his thumb up and down Harry’s bicep.

 

“Yeah, same.” Harry yawned out.

 

It was a little past eight twenty, them starting dinner around seven thirty.

 

Liam let out a small sigh and pulled Harry in closer.

 

True to both their words, they were both asleep by the time the dwarves got to the goblin lair. Liam was snoring softly, little puffs of air hitting the top of Harry’s head, Harry’s arms curled around his middle and his head resting on his chest.

 

+

 

Louis exited the flat quickly, making his way to his car. He climbed in but just sat there... for a good twenty minutes.

 

Eventually, he turned on the car and backed out of his spot, driving off. He wasn’t exactly lying when he said he was going to Eleanor’s but he didn’t go there first. Instead he drove to this little hole-in-the-wall coffee shop that was close by. Not many people knew about it, so he was usually fine about fans. He parked on the back street, pulling on some sunglasses before exiting the car. He walked around the block, going unnoticed, before entering the shop.

 

“Louis! How nice to see you!” The owner, Mary, said. She was an older woman, maybe in her early sixties. She had soft, greying ginger hair and the most comforting smile Louis had ever come across.

 

He pulled off his sunglasses and put them in his pocket. “Hi, Mary. Just my usual please.” He told her, pulling out the money from his wallet and sliding it across the counter before stepping to the side. “May need more than one of these. Might be here for awhile.” Louis told her.

 

“Oh? Why’s that?” Mary asked.

 

“Just a lot on my mind. Need to think about some stuff.” He said, taking the mug that was handed to him.

 

“Stay as long as you want, love.” Mary said softly. “And if you wanna talk about it, I’m all ears.” She said, smiling at him.

 

“I- I might take you up on that.” Louis sighed out.

 

“Well, come on back here.” She said, gesturing to the stool behind the counter.

 

Louis smiled and nodded, though his smile didn’t reach his eyes. He walked around the counter and took a seat on the stool, Mary sitting on the one next to him.

 

Louis took a sip of his tea before glancing to Mary, who was looking at him, warm expression on her face.

 

“I- God, this is going to sound terrible.” Louis groaned out.

 

“I’m not going to judge you, dear. And if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine too.” She said, placing a hand on his shoulder.

 

“I- I cheated, on Eleanor.” Louis whispered.

 

“Oh!” Mary squeaked.

 

“With a guy.” Louis said even more quietly than the last time.

 

“Oh, dear...” Marry said softly.

 

“And I just- You know Harry, yeah?” Mary nodded. “It was with him.” Louis said shakily. “And I- I think I- I might love him. I’m just really scared.” Louis said quietly.

 

“Well, Louis... Who feels right for you?” She questioned.

 

“I- Harry. It was just- Everything felt so right. It wasn’t like- I don’t know. I’m pretty sure Harry.” Louis said hesitantly.

 

“Then, there’s your answer.” Mary said simply.

 

“It’s not as easy as you think it’d be.” Louis said.

 

“Why’s that?” Mary asked.

 

“Well, for one, I’m still with Eleanor. And two, I don’t- I don’t even know if Harry likes me. What if it was just like a quick fling for him. I don’t- I don’t know. I’ve never been with a boy before.” Louis whispered.

 

“Well, I think you definitely need to talk to Eleanor about this.” Mary started.

 

“I’m going to after I leave here, which is why I may be here for awhile. I don’t even know what to tell her.” Louis said.

 

“Well, just let her know what happened and let her know about your feelings for Harry. I hate to say this, but I’m sure that that relationship is going to end.” She said.

 

“I figured as much.” Louis sighed out.

 

“And did you not like being with a boy? Because as far as I knew, you were straight.” Mary said softly.

 

“That’s what I thought. I don’t really know. It’s not that I look at other boys. Like, I’m pretty sure I’d cry if it were any of the other boys. I just- Harry has this thing about him. I don’t know how to explain it. I used to brush the feelings off, try and pin them as something else. But I’m pretty sure that- I don’t even know the word to use. I guess, I’m attracted to him. A lot.” Louis mumbled, looking down to his mug of tea. He brought it up to his lips and took a small sip.

 

“It seems you know how you feel. You just don’t know how to express those feelings?” Mary prompted.

 

“I- Yeah... I just feel so guilty about what happened. I didn’t mean for it too, it just did. And like- Harry, he was afraid I was going to regret it. And I told him I wouldn’t but-“

 

“But you do.” Mary finished for him.

 

Louis nodded mutely, his eyes tearing up.

 

“But why?” She asked softly, moving her hand to rub his back.

 

He sniffled a bit, reaching his hand up to scrub at his eyes. “I don’t- I guess just cos- Eleanor. I mean, we have a great relationship but it was just- just better with Harry. He was so sweet and he paid attention to me. He always treats me wonderfully and he’s always there when she and I are having problems. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had and I think I may have messed that up.” Louis choked out, a few tears falling down his face.

 

“Lou, honey...” Mary cooed, gently wiping off his cheeks. “I doubt you messed that up. If he cares for you as much as you say he does, than I’m sure this isn’t gonna affect that. It may cause a bump in the road but I’m sure things will be alright.” She said gently.

 

“You think?” Louis sniffled out.

 

“I know. And if not, then I’ll give you free tea for a month.” She said with a smile.

 

Louis smiled softly. “You’re that sure?” Louis asked.

 

“Positive.” She said, bringing a hand to stroke his fringe out of his eyes.

 

Just then, the bell on the door jingled and a middle aged man and woman came in, walking up to the counter.

 

“Hi, can I get a caramel latte and, John, dear, what do you want?” She asked, turning to the man.

 

“Oh, just a black coffee, please.” He said, smiling at Mary and Louis.

 

The woman looked down from the menu, looking behind the counter, her eyes widening. “Aren’t you the one from that band? Oh, God, what was the name? The one Sophia likes.” She asked.

 

“Oh! One Direction!!” John said.

 

Louis’ eyes widened but he nodded. “Uh, yeah. That’s me. But please don’t tell anyone I’m here. I don’t have any security and I’m having a really bad day.” Louis said softly.

 

“Oh, no. It’s just- Our daughter loves your band. Could we maybe get a picture? I’m sure she’ll hate us but it’ll be funny.” The woman chuckled out.

 

“Oh, of course.” Louis said, smiling slightly. He got up and made his way around the counter. The lady pulled her phone out of her purse and held it out for him to take. “Mary, do you think you could?” Louis trailed off, gesturing to the phone.

 

“Of course, dear! I hope I know how to do this.” She chuckled out.

 

Louis opened the camera app on the iPhone and handed it to her. “Just press the circle on the screen.” Louis told her.

 

He moved in between the man and woman, smiling brightly.

 

“One, two, three...” The shutter sound went off. Louis moved away from the couple to grab the phone. He looked at the picture, smiling as he handed the phone back to the woman.

 

“It was nice meeting you, John and...”

 

“Oh, Lauren! I’m Lauren.” The woman chuckled out.

 

“Louis. It was a pleasure. Do you want an autograph?” He asked.

 

“Would you? That would be wonderful!” Lauren exclaimed.

 

“Do you have anything I can sign?” Louis questioned.

 

“Actually, we just bought her a book. You could sign that?” She said.

 

“That’d be fine.” Louis said, smiling at her. “Mary, do you have a pen?” Louis asked, turning around to look at the woman while Lauren pulled the book out of her bag. Mary handed him a pen from a mug sitting there containing pens and pencils. Louis turned back around and smiled at the book he was presented. “One of my favourites. Harry loves it too.” Louis murmured, taking the copy of The Hobbit from her.

 

He turned around and placed the book on the counter, opening the cover to the title page. He leant over and started writing.

 

“It’s Sophia with a ‘ph’, right?” Louis asked.

 

“Yeah.” Lauren said.

 

_Dear Sophia,_

_I’ve just met your parents today and they’re wonderful. I bet you’re just as wonderful as them. I hope you like this book. It’s one of my favourites. Harry loves it too. He always steals my copy. I’m glad you’re a fan. That really means a lot to all of us._

_Lots of Love,_

_Louis xx_

 

Louis closed the book and turned around, handing it back to Lauren, who safely tucked it in her bag.

 

“Thank you so much. This’ll probably make her entire existence.” Lauren chuckled out.

 

“No problem. It was nice meeting you. Don’t forget your drinks!” Louis said, gesturing to the cups on the counter.

 

“Oh, duh.” Lauren laughed. She pulled her wallet out of her purse as Louis walked back around the counter, taking a seat on the stool again. “Thank you again!”

 

“Yeah, thank you so much. Soph’ll be ecstatic.” John said, guiding Lauren out of the shop.

 

Louis let out a small sigh and turned to Mary, looking at her with a sad expression.

 

“Oh, Lou. I know it’s hard but I’m sure everything’s gonna be fine.” She cooed softly.

 

Louis sniffled softly and looked down to his lap before reaching out for his mug he placed on the counter. He brought it up and drank down the rest of it before putting it back down.

 

“You want another, dear?” Mary asked gently, rubbing her hand in circles across Louis’ back.

 

Louis whimpered and nodded, bringing his hands up to press the heels of his palms into his eyes, trying to stop the tears. Mary sighed and got up, bringing Louis’ mug with her to make more tea. Louis let out a choked off sob into his hands as he started crying.

 

Mary placed the new mug of tea down in front of him before wrapping her arms around his shoulders, rubbing over his back.

 

“I hate this.” Louis mumbled through his tears.

 

“I know, darling. But it’s life. You just gotta roll with it.” She told him.

 

“Y-Yeah. Th-Thanks.” Louis sniffled out.

 

Mary let go of him and moved back to her stool, watching people pass by through the windows.

 

Louis sat there for maybe two hours, quietly chatting with Mary when she wasn’t filling orders, before his phone rang. He barley heard it at first but he pulled it out of his jeans at the last second, seeing Liam’s name on the screen before answering it.

 

“Hey, Li! What’s up?” Louis asked.

 

“ _I cannot believe you. You’re a fucking dick, is what’s up_.” Liam said angrily.

 

“Uh, what the fuck are you talking about, mate?” Louis questioned quietly, waving to Mary that he was going in the back.

 

“ _Don’t act stupid, Louis. I know what happened.”_ Oh. Maybe it was something different then what he was thinking.

 

“I don-“

 

“ _Harry called me crying this morning. What the fuck is your problem?”_ Liam asked harshly.

 

“Why was he crying?” Louis barely whispered.

 

“ _You left him. You fucking got off with him and then you told him you were going to Eleanor’s. No. You didn’t even tell him. You left him a fucking note. You can’t just lead him on like that. He has feelings, Louis. If all you wanted was to get off, you should’ve done it yourself. He thinks you hate him. I don’t know what possessed you to do this but you need to fix it.”_ Liam said.

 

Tears were quickly filling Louis’ eyes. “I- I don’t- Fuck, Li. I- Fuck!” Louis groaned out.

 

“ _You don’t what?”_ Liam asked.

 

“I don’t hate him. Just- Let him know, okay?” Louis whispered.

 

“ _Yeah, sure. Anything else?”_ Liam questioned. Louis had never heard him this angry before.

 

“I don’t- I don’t know, alright.” Louis said quietly.

 

“ _Don’t come back until you’ve figured your shit out.”_

Liam hung up before Louis could answer. Louis brought a hand up and covered his mouth as he let out a small sob. Then he couldn’t stop it. He started sobbing uncontrollably. He pressed his back against a wall before sinking to the ground, bringing his hands up to roughly grab his hair.

 

When Louis didn’t come back for awhile, Mary made her way to the back to find him curled up on the ground, sobbing into his hands.

 

“Oh, Lou... What happened, dear?” Marry asked softly.

 

“I- I- Th- Liam- He just- He just called me. He- He yelled. S-Said Harry- Harry called him c-crying this morning. H-Harry th-thinks- Thinks I hate h-him.” Louis sobbed out.

 

“Lou, you don’t though. We both know that. Come on, love. Get up and we’ll talk about it.” Mary cooed.

 

Louis sniffled but nodded, pushing himself off the floor. He scrubbed at his eyes, wiping away the tears. Mary stepped towards him, wrapping him up in her arms. Louis squeezed her tightly, pulling her in close.

 

“You’re alright, sweetie. It’s gonna be fine. I promise.” Mary said softly before pulling back, reaching up to wipe his cheeks off.

 

Louis let out a small hiccup but nodded.

 

“Come on. Let’s go sit down.” Mary murmured.

 

She gently guided Louis back out front, leading him back to their stools. Louis sat down on the chair, reaching up to wipe his eyes before looking over to Mary. She was smiling sadly at him.

 

“You wanna tell me what that was about?” She asked softly.

 

“I- This is gonna sound even worse but- but the only reason this all happened is cos- cos we got, uhm, high last night.” Louis whispered.

 

“Oh, Lou...” Mary sighed.

 

“Yeah, I know. But, uhm, we- we fell asleep in my bed and- and I- I left him there, this morning.” Louis whimpered. “I didn’t- I just didn’t know what to do so I left. And apparently he- he called Liam crying. That was Liam. He- Pardon me, but he called me a dick and said not to come back until I’ve sorted my shit out. I just- I never meant to hurt him. I- I just- Never. But I do need to sort my shit out. I really have to go talk to El. How late are you open today?” Louis asked quietly.

 

“Midnight. It is Saturday, after all. Why?” She asked.

 

“I just- I think I’m gonna come back here after I go there. Don’t know if I’m ready to go home.” Louis whispered.

 

“That’s fine. I’ll be here all day. Adam’s away for a bit to visit his cousin in Ireland.” Mary told him.

 

“How is he, by the way? Haven’t seen him in awhile.” Louis asked.

 

“He’s good. Has a girlfriend now. My baby’s growing up.” Mary said fondly.

 

“Mare, I hate to break it to you but he’s like- What is he? Twenty nine? Thirty?” Louis chuckled out.

 

“Don’t remind me, Lou. It’s hard, being a mother.” She sighed.

 

“I’ve always wanted kids.” Louis whispered.

 

“Maybe you and Harry will make some nice babies.” She grinned.

 

“Mary Elise!” Louis gasped before breaking into a fit of giggles.

 

“What? I’m just saying. If you guys could, they’d be very attractive.” She said, smiling brightly.

 

Louis giggled again before nodding. “They would be, but unfortunately that’s not possible. I don’t even know if we’re possible.” Louis sighed out.

 

“Well, maybe if you get a move on, you can work on that.” She told him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

 

“I suppose I should. Be best to get it over with. I hope El doesn’t slap me. Jesus, I’m a terrible person. And God, what is management gonna think?! I’m gonna have to tell them we broke up. Things are gonna be nuts.” Louis groaned.

 

“Like I said, I’m sure everything will be just fine. Now, get up and go. I’ll see you later, sweetheart.” Mary said softly.

 

Louis smiled slightly and nodded. “S’pose I should. I’ll be back.” Louis sighed out, getting up from his seat. He leant over and pecked Mary’s cheek before walking around the counter. He pulled his sunglasses out of his pocket and made his way to the door. “Bye, Mare! See you in a bit!” Louis called over his shoulder.

 

He quickly made his way around the block, thankful that no one recognised him. He climbed in his car and started it up. He took a deep breath before pulling off the curb, starting the journey to Eleanor’s.

 

The ride passed by quicker than Louis would’ve like but there he was, pulling into her driveway. He shut the car off and sat there for a bit, trying to straighten his thoughts; think about what he was going to say.

 

He eventually convinced himself to get out, making his way to the door. He hesitated before knocking, waiting in the warm summer air.

 

Just as he was about to leave, the door swung open revealing Eleanor in pyjamas and a tank top.

 

“Lou, babe! Hi! What a nice surprise!” She exclaimed.

 

“I- Uh... We- We need to, uhm- We need to talk...” Louis mumbled out, looking down to his feet.

 

“Oh, uh, yeah... Come on in.” Eleanor said quietly, stepping out of the way so Louis could come inside.

 

She shut the door behind him before turning to face him. He was staring at his hands which he was twisting together.

 

“Lou... What’s this about?” Eleanor asked, trying to prepare herself for the worst.

 

“I- Uh- Us.” Louis whispered. “I just want you to know I’m sorry. I never meant for it to happen, but it did.” Louis said.

 

“Did-“ Eleanor paused, trying not to think about what she was about to say. “Did you cheat on me?” She whispered.

 

“I- Uh...” Louis nodded solemnly, tears filling his eyes.

 

“Why?” She asked. Her tone was soft, but Louis could hear the hurt in her voice.

 

“I was stupid and I got high and horny and they were- they were just there.” Louis said.

 

“Who-“ Eleanor cleared her throat. “Who was it?” She asked.

 

“I, uhm- It was- It was, uh-“

 

“Who was it, Lou?” She asked sternly.

 

“Harry.” Louis said quietly, glancing up to gauge her reaction.

 

Her eyes were wide, like a deer caught in headlights. “Oh.” She breathed out.

 

“I- Yeah- I just- I’m so sorry. I don’t want to hurt you but- I think-“ Louis cut himself off.

 

“You think what? Are you breaking up with me?!” She asked.

 

“I-“ Louis nodded.

 

“Jesus, Lou. How long have you guys been fucking around then?” She questioned, angry tone to her voice.

 

“El, it’s not like- It was never like that! We haven’t- It was just last night. It wasn’t even supposed to happen.” Louis whispered.

 

“Then why did it? Why are you breaking up with me?” She asked.

 

“I- You- You know how I get when I’m high.” Louis said, looking down.

 

“Oh, what? So, you got hard and you got off with him? Why didn’t you do it yourself? Why did he have to be involved?” She questioned, malice in her voice.

 

“I don’t know, El. It just- It just happened.” Louis said.

 

“So, then why are you breaking up with me?” She asked again.

 

“I-“ Louis brought his hand up and covered his mouth, choking down a sob as some tears fell from his eyes.

 

“Oh, no. Don’t fucking tell me this is happening. You have feelings for him? Is that it?” She asked harshly.

 

Louis let out another sob but nodded, trying to stop his tears.

 

“Why are you crying? I should be the one that’s upset.” Eleanor questioned, her voice was a little softer, but there was still spite in her tone.

 

“Fuck, El. I’m so sorry. I hate myself right now.” Louis choked out. “Ha-Harry. He- He thinks I hate him. I- I don’t. I- I-“

 

“Do you love him? Is that what- Oh, this cannot be happening.” Eleanor groaned, moving over to the couch to sit down, dropping her head into her hands.

 

Louis was still standing in the middle of the room, arms wrapped around his stomach and he let out little hiccups and sobs.

 

None of them moved for a few minutes until Eleanor spoke up.

 

“Lou... Come sit down, okay?” Eleanor sighed out.

 

Louis hiccupped before slowly moving to the couch, sitting next to her.

 

“Lou, babe. Look at me.” Eleanor said softly.

 

Louis sniffled but picked his head up, looking at her through teary eyes.

 

“Look, I’m upset, yeah. But this can’t be easy for you. I didn’t even know you liked boys.” She said.

 

“I don’t.” Louis whispered.

 

“So, just him?” She questioned.

 

“Y-Yeah. I just- I don’t even know how to explain it.” Louis sniffled out.

 

“I get it. I’ve known people like that, but why are you so upset?” She asked, softly.

 

“Because I’m a fucking dick. I just- I left Harry in my own bed this morning. Left him a note saying I was coming here. Then Liam called me and just- He started yelling at me; telling me how much of a dick I was, that I couldn’t come back until I’ve sorted my shit out. But like, apparently Harry- He- He called Liam this morning and he was crying because of me. And I feel like fucking shit. I never- I never wanted to hurt anyone. But now I hurt him and you and Liam’s mad at me. Fuck. I’m so stupid.” Louis whimpered out.

 

“Jesus, Lou. What the fuck?” Eleanor said.

 

“I was scared. I didn’t know what to do, so I- so I left. I’m terrified. I fucked everything up. I fucked us up, I fucked him up, I probably fucked up the band. This is all my fault.” Louis groaned.

 

“Did you fuck him?” Eleanor asked.

 

“What?! I- No! No! Jesus, El. No, I didn’t. He didn’t even touch my dick. Christ.” Louis rushed out.

 

“Then how the fuck did you get off? How does that even work?” Eleanor questioned.

 

“Can we not?” Louis whispered.

 

“Sorry, sorry. I just- Sorry.” She said.

 

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I should be the one that’s saying sorry. I fucked everything up for a shot in the dark. I don’t even know if he likes me. It could’ve been a one night stand for all I know. God, why am I so stupid?” Louis said.

 

“Because you care. You care about everyone and that’s one of the things I like about you. You honestly think he doesn’t like you? Why would he have been crying if he didn’t? You’re stupid because you can’t see what’s right in front of you. I honestly should’ve seen this coming.” Eleanor sighed out.

 

“You don’t know that. He was probably crying because I did exactly what I said I wouldn’t do. I- I told him I wouldn’t regret it, regret him, but I do and he knows that. He obviously knows that because I wasn’t there this morning. I ran. That’s what I did. I ran and I’m a coward and I don’t know how to sort my shit out so I don’t know if I’m going home any time soon.” Louis said solemnly.

 

“Why do you regret it? Isn’t that what you wanted? And yeah, you’re a fucking coward.” Eleanor said.

 

“Gee, thanks, El. And I didn’t even know I wanted it until it happened. I just- I’ve been repressing my feelings for awhile and I just-“ Louis cut himself off with a small huff.

 

“How long have you had feelings for him? Christ, Lou. Have you just been lying to me this whole time?” Eleanor asked hesitantly.

 

“No! No! I just- I didn’t really know I liked him until that happened. I’ve just been pushing all these feelings away, ignoring them, thinking they were something else. I don’t know. I never really thought about any of it but now it’s hitting me all at once and it’s overwhelming and I’m so fucking lost. I’ve never been with a guy. I don’t know what it’s like, or what to do. I just wish things were easy.” Louis said quietly.

 

“Things are never going to be simple. Especially not for you; with the band and the fame. You’re always gonna have a lot on your plate. It sucks but that’s just how it is. Sometimes it’s even hard for me and I’m not even famous. Like, you have so much shit going on. I can’t even imagine.” Eleanor murmured. She reached out and gently picked up his hand, wrapping it in her own. “You’re just gonna have to fight through all this stuff. You’re gonna have to make things right with Harry, whether you end up together or not. Make sure you guys are okay, and the band is okay and I’m sure everything will sort itself out.” She said softly.

 

“Thanks, El. I don’t deserve you. I really don’t. You’re amazing and I’m sorry I did this. I don’t want to lose you as a friend, if that’s okay with you.” Louis whispered.

 

“I would love that. And you need to tell me what happens when you go back to your house tonight, okay? Just call me if you need to talk; if something happens. Alright?” Eleanor told him.

 

“You’re honestly too good for me. I really hate myself for doing this. And I hate saying this, but I have to talk to management about us breaking up. Like, you know how much they loved us together.” Louis sighed out.

 

“You’re probably gonna have a lot to talk about with them. Especially if you and Harry get together.” She said.

 

“Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I hadn’t even thought about that. Shit, they’re going to hate me.” Louis whispered.

 

“I’m sure you guys can work something out.” Eleanor said softly, stroking over the back of his hand with her thumb.

 

“I hope so.” Louis said.

 

“Oh, I still expect you to take me shopping, Louis Tomlinson.” Eleanor said, a small grin on her face.

 

“Of course.” Louis chuckled out. He let out a small sigh. “I’m sorry again. I really am.” Louis whispered.

 

“You can’t control who you love, Louis. I would’ve talked to you about it if I was in the same situation. Of course, I would’ve liked it better if you talked to me before you got off with him. But it’s not something you can control. I’m not gonna stop you from going after him. That wouldn’t be fair to any of us, especially since he has feelings for you too.” Eleanor told him.

 

“Why is everyone saying that?” Louis groaned.

 

“Everyone? Who else did you tell?” Eleanor asked worriedly.

 

“Just Mary, from that coffee shop that I always go to.” Louis mumbled.

 

“Oh, she’s wonderful.” Eleanor said, smiling softly at him.

 

“Yeah, I’m supposed to go back there after I leave here. She wants to know how everything went. You didn’t slap me, so that’s good.” Louis chuckled out.

 

“Slap you?! Why would I do that?” Eleanor gasped.

 

“I don’t know. Always prepared for the worst. It would’ve been very cliché.” Louis said, a small grin on his face.

 

“Atrocious. Absolutely atrocious, is what you are, Louis Tomlinson.” She chuckled out.

 

“I’m sorry! I was pretty sure you wouldn’t but you never know.” Louis laughed out.

 

Eleanor reached her hand up and swatted at the side of his head. “Rude.” She giggled out.

 

“You’re rude.” Louis mumbled, reaching up and grabbing her hand.

 

“How am I rude?! You’re the one that broke up with me!” She exclaimed.

 

“You’re gonna use that against me for awhile, aren’t you?” Louis chuckled.

 

“Forever, Lou. Never gonna let it go. You’re just gonna have to buy me a lot of Starbucks and we’ll see how I feel about it then.” Eleanor told him.

 

“As you wish.” Louis said, bowing his head,

 

“You’re so cheesy, oh my God. How did I deal with you? Good luck to Harry.” She groaned. “I hope you guys get to quote stupid romance movies at each other forever. God, you absolute cheesball.”

 

“That’s me. Just made of cheese.” Louis grinned.

 

“Oh my God. Shut up, you absolute idiot.” Eleanor groaned out.

 

“You love it.” Louis said, smiling at her.

 

“I do. But you know what would make me really happy right now?” She said.

 

“What’s that?” Louis asked.

 

“If you sorted your shit out and went home. I have a nail appointment in like half an hour and it’s across town.” She said, smirking at him.

 

“Oh, you’re so sweet. I love you too, El.” Louis said. “I’m not going home though. Going back to see Mary first. Maybe go home at midnight.”

 

“Midnight?! Why?” She exclaimed.

 

“Like I said earlier, I’m a huge coward. I don’t want to have to face Harry because I’m a prick and I don’t deserve anybody at the moment.” Louis sighed out.

 

“Don’t say that, Lou. You do deserve him. But you need to brave up and face him. You can’t avoid him forever. You can only drink so much tea at a coffee shop. Christ, you live with the kid! Are you just gonna hide in your room all day?” Eleanor asked.

 

“Uhm...”

 

“That shouldn’t even be an option for you. You’re one of the most outgoing people I know. This should be easy for you.” Eleanor tried.

 

“It’s not- It’s different.” Louis whispered.

 

“You were so confident when you came up to me. Where’s all that confidence?” She asked softly.

 

“It’s different, El. Like, this is like talking to girls for the first time all over again. He’s a boy. It’s like- It’s new and I don’t know what to do. I feel so inexperienced. God, it’s like puberty all over again.” Louis groaned.

 

“You’re so daft, did you know that? You honestly- He’s a person, Louis. He’s your best friend. Just talk to him like you do every day. It’s not that hard.” Eleanor said.

 

“Oh, yeah. Coming from Miss I-don’t-know-my-own-name.” Louis challenged.

 

“Fuck you. You were famous. What the hell was I supposed to do?!” She fought back.

 

“Say ‘Hi, I’m Eleanor and you’re the most attractive boy I’ve ever seen in my entire life.’” Louis teased.

 

“I don’t know... I think I’m more of a Zayn girl myself. Those cheekbones, though.” She sighed out.

 

“Hey, fuck you! I have great cheekbones, you twat.” Louis exclaimed.

 

“Yeah, yeah. Sure you do.” She giggled, reaching up to pat his cheek. “Oh, crap. I need to leave in like ten minutes.” Eleanor gasped.

 

“Alright, babe. You get going and I’ll get going and I’ll let you know if I end up sleeping in my car tonight or not.” Louis said.

 

“So help me God, Louis Tomlinson. If you don’t go home tonight, I will go over myself and tell Harry you wank off to shirtless pictures of him that you found on google.” She said.

 

“I do not! You are a liar, Eleanor Calder. A big fat liar.” Louis exclaimed.

 

“Get out before I slap you.” Eleanor laughed, standing up from the couch.

 

Louis followed her up and wrapped her in a tight hug. “Thank you for not slapping me. I love you, El. I’m sorry again.” Louis whispered.

 

Eleanor just reached behind him and smacked his bum. “Spoke too soon. Now leave so I can go.” She mumbled.

 

“Bye, El.” Louis said, making his way to the door. He turned and smiled at her before walking out.

 

He climbed into his car and sat there, taking a deep breath, before starting the car. He backed out and drove back to the coffee shop, parking in the same place as before. He, yet again, pulled on his sunglasses and quickly made his way to the shop, the bell signalling his entrance.

 

Mary was in the middle of making someone their order so Louis quietly made his way to the table closest to the entrance to behind the counter, pulling out his phone and looking at it, trying to hide himself from the young looking girl at the counter. (You can never be too cautious.)

 

Thankfully, she left without noticing him. Louis immediately moved to the stool behind the counter when the door shut. He pulled off his sunglasses and put them in his pocket, looking over to Mary who was staring at him with a soft smile.

 

“How’d it go?” She asked.

 

“Surprisingly, very well. We did break up but we’re still friends and everything is actually alright. She actually let me talk to her about Harry and we were joking around. It was really nice.” Louis replied softly.

 

“That’s wonderful, Lou. I’m glad things went well. Now, when are you going home?” She questioned accusingly.

 

“Never. I’m going to live on the streets and mooch off of you for the rest of my life.” Louis replied.

 

“Seriously, Lou. You need to talk to him about this.” She sighed.

 

“I know, I know. I’ll probably stay here for the rest of the day, til you close. I’ll talk to him tomorrow or summat.” Louis mumbled.

 

“It’d be better to just get it over with, babe.” Mary voiced.

 

“I don’t- I’m not ready, I don’t think. I just- I need some time.” Louis whispered.

 

“I get that. But you do have to do it eventually.” Mary said softly.

 

“I know, Mare. I just- I need to think about how to tell him what I want to without crying.” Louis sighed out.

 

“Oh, don’t be a baby. Just get right out with it. Be like, ‘Hi, Harry. I love you and I want your babies.’ Simple. It worked for me, and George and I are so happy. So, just be straightforward. It’s ninety nine percent effective.” Mary chuckled out.

 

“Yeah, but what about that one percent. There’s always that chance. What if he actually doesn’t like me like I like him. I’m scared, Mary. I’m so scared.” Louis whispered.

 

“Trust me when I say, everything’ll be fine. And if not, you’ll have a month’s supply of already prepared tea at your disposal.” She said.

 

“Yeah. I- I guess.” Louis said quietly.

 

“It’ll be okay, Lou. You have my number, right? In case you need anything.” Mary said.

 

“I actually don’t think I do.” Louis said.

 

He pulled his phone out and opened a new contact page, handing her the phone. She put in her contact information before handing the phone back to Louis.

 

“Thanks, Mare. I owe you. If you ever need anything, let me know, okay?” Louis told her, voice soft and sincere.

 

“I’ll let you know, love. You wanna help me out around here?” She asked.

 

“That’d be nice.” Louis replied, hopping off the stool.

 

Louis spent the next couple hours cleaning the tables and sweeping the floor. He helped clean some of the dishes and helped organise the delivery of baked goods that the bakery down the street dropped off.

 

By the time he had sat back down, it was coming up on eight o’ clock.

 

Mary sat down next to him, looking out the window in the front of the shop.

 

“Only a few more hours, Lou. You sure you don’t want to go now?” Mary asked.

 

“You trying to get rid of me?” Louis chuckled out.

 

“Not a chance. You’re too helpful. If the singing ever fails, you can come work here.” She said softly.

 

“You’re too kind.” Louis sighed.

 

“I’m just a decent human. There’s not many of us out there. We’re a rare species.” She said, a small smile on her face.

 

“Oh, God. What does that make me?!” Louis exclaimed.

 

“Troubled. You’re troubled, Lou. And you need to ‘figure your shit out’” She airquoted.

 

Louis barked out a laugh. “Thanks.” He let out a small sigh. “It’s true though, innit?” Louis asked quietly.

 

“Yes. You have a lot of stuff going on and you need to get yourself through it. Starting with Harry. Do that first.” She told him.

 

“I’m gonna have to. I live with him.” Louis sighed out.

 

“Well, yeah. That might be a problem if you don’t sort it soon.” Mary said.

 

“Yeah...” Louis sighed.

 

Mary smiled at him before getting up from her stool to help the customer that just walked in. The next four hours passed by in a blur and before Louis knew it, it was midnight.

 

“I guess this is it, Mare.” Louis whispered, standing in front of her by the door.

 

“Come back tomorrow and let me know what happened. Or call me even.” She said softly.

 

“I will. I definitely will.” Louis said.

 

“Go get’im, tiger.” Mary chuckled out.

 

Louis smiled and pecked her cheek before pulling his sunglasses on.

 

“See you tomorrow.” Louis said as he made his way out the door.

 

He made his way to his car, the air warm, a soft breeze blowing through the London streets. He got into his car but just sat there. He was hoping Harry was asleep right now. He reluctantly started the car and drove away from the curb, going exactly the speed limit all the way home. He knew he was being childish but he was terrified of what was going to happen. He slowly got out of his car, locking it, and made his way to the door. He unlocked it and stepped inside to be met with silence.

 

+

 

Unfortunately for Liam, he was a very light sleeper. The door shutting had him blearily opening his eyes, glancing to the alarm clock, seeing it was a little after midnight. He looked down to see Harry curled around him, breathing softly into his chest.

 

Liam didn’t want to wake him up but he wanted to see if it was Louis. He carefully pried Harry’s arms off of him and slowly crawled out of bed, making his way to the hall. He stood just around the corner to the stairs when a warm pair of arms wrapped around him.

 

“What’re you doing, Li?” Harry whispered.

 

“Waiting.” Liam said bluntly.

 

“For what?” Harry asked quietly.

 

“Louis.” Liam said.

 

“Oh...” Harry breathed out.

 

Liam heard a small whimper and he immediately turned around, cupping Harry’s jaw. “Haz, no. Don’t cry. You’re alright. You’re okay.” Liam said. Harry let out another whimper, squeezing his eyes shut. “No, no. Come here, love.” Liam whispered, pulling Harry in.

 

He gently pushed him up against the wall and tilted his head to connect their lips. Harry whimpered again but wrapped his arms around Liam’s waist, pulling him in. Harry slipped his tongue out, Liam letting it venture into his mouth. Their tongues met softly, slowly moving against each other’s. Liam tilted his head and pushed his tongue out, delving further into Harry’s mouth.

 

+

 

Louis carefully toed off his shoes and put his keys in the bowl in the foyer. All of a sudden, he could faintly hear voices coming from upstairs. He froze, because that was Harry and another guy. Louis hadn’t even thought that Harry would bring somebody home.

 

He cautiously made his way to the stairs and quietly climbed up them, turning the corner but stopping dead. This was worse than Harry bringing someone home. Harry was snogging Liam in the dim light of the hallway.

 

“Oh.” Louis breathed out.

 

Harry gasped and immediately pulled back, his head snapping towards Louis. Louis could see tears in his eyes. He quickly pulled out of Liam’s grasp and rushed into his room, slamming the door shut.

 

“Liam?” Louis asked cautiously.

 

“Don’t Liam me. You have no right.” Liam said, turning to stare at Louis.

 

“But- I don’t understand- Why-“ Louis cut himself off, tears forming in his eyes.

 

“You left him, Louis. He needed somebody and I was there. You fucked him up, Louis. He- He’s fragile. You can’t just fuck with his feelings.” Liam said harshly.

 

“Feelings? What feelings? Did it even mean anything to him?” Louis asked shakily.

 

“Fuck. Are you kidding me, Lou?! You’re one of my best mates but this is fucked up. He has feelings. He’s a human being. Fuck, I can’t do this right now. I’m going to bed. You’re an arsehole.” Liam said before turning to walk into Harry’s room, shutting the door behind him.

 

Louis let out a loud sob, quickly shutting himself in his room. He walked over to the bed and collapsed down, sobbing into the duvet. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dropped it on the bed before taking his clothes off with shaky hands. He crawled under the covers and reached out for his phone, shakily calling Eleanor.

 

He was about to hang up but then her voice travelled through the phone.

 

“ _Lou, babe, what’s up?_ ” She asked softly. Louis let out a loud sob, not being able to get words out. “ _Oh, no. Lou, what happened? Come on. Talk to me._ ” She said.

 

“He- He-”

 

” _What did he do? Come on, Lou.”_ Eleanor pressed.

 

“He was- He was s-snogging- Snogging Liam.” Louis sobbed out.

 

” _What? Why?!”_ She exclaimed.

 

“I- I don’t- I don’t know. I didn’t- Didn’t get a clear answer.” Louis choked out.

 

“ _Fuck. What the hell! Is he sleeping with him?!_ ” She asked.

 

“Fuck. I don’t- I don’t know. L-Liam said s-something about me not being there and h-he was. That Harry needed someone. H-How was I supposed to know? Fuck! I knew he didn’t like me. I’m so fucking stupid. Now he’s with Liam and- and I just-“ Louis let out a loud sob, turning and curling into himself.

 

“ _Lou, no. Babe, don’t- Don’t think like that. I’m sure it’s not like that._ ” Eleanor said softly.

 

“How could it not be? I wasn’t there for him. He- He moved on. He probably didn’t even like me in the first place. I don’t know how long they’ve been together. That’s- That’s probably why Liam was so mad. He just- Yelled. I couldn’t- And Harry looked like he was crying. El, I fucked up so bad. I don’t know what to do.” Louis sobbed out.

 

“ _Lou, please don’t think like that. I’m sure it’s just a big misunderstanding. God, this sucks. I’m so sorry, love. I know that can’t be easy._ ” Eleanor tried.

 

“Fuck. I can’t do this. I’m going to bed.” Louis whispered.

 

 _“Lou... Just- Call me when you wake up. Okay, love? I hate seeing you like this. But goodnight. I love you.”_ Eleanor sighed out.

 

“Y-Yeah, El. I will. I love you too. Goodnight.” Louis sniffled out before hanging up. He reached out and grabbed a pillow, wrapping his arms around it. He slowly slipped off into a restless sleep.

 

+

 

Liam walked into the room to find Harry sniffling, curled into himself.

 

“Haz,” Liam breathed out, rushing over and climbing into the bed, wrapping Harry up in his arms. “You’re alright. Come on, love. Calm down. Just calm down.” Liam whispered.

 

All of a sudden, they heard a loud sob come from the hallway.

 

“Liam?! Is he crying?! Why is he crying?” Harry asked frantically. “I- I can’t- I need to-“ Harry whined, trying to squirm out of Liam’s grip.

 

“No, Haz. Stay. You need to sleep. That’s what you need to do right now.” Liam said softly, rubbing over Harry’s stomach.

 

“He- He needs me Liam. I can’t just- I can’t just leave him- like that. I just- I can’t.” Harry whimpered, still squirming around.

 

“Harry Edward Styles. You can talk to him in the morning. I’m not letting you leave this bed tonight.” Liam said sternly.

 

Harry let out a sob but nodded, turning around in Liam’s hold so he could curl into the boy’s chest. Liam ducked down and pressed a soft kiss to the boy’s lips.

 

“Please go to sleep, love. You’re not gonna feel good in the morning if you don’t.” Liam whispered against his lips.

 

Harry nodded, pressing their lips together again before tucking his head under Liam’s chin.

 

Liam waited until he heard Harry’s breathing even out before he allowed himself to slip off to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> again, i love your feedback! so let me know what you thought!!  
> <3 xx


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